How do I know this button exists? Please, everyone knows it exists.
In The Canadian Nights, this infamous button is pressed while the Canadian prime minister is live streaming a hockey game. Without hockey to vent his pent-up aggression, the Canadian prime minister snaps. He stops saying "please" and "thank you". He pushes past people without saying "excuse me". He even litters. That's right he drops a gum wrapper on the sidewalk and doesn't pick it up.
Worst of all, he has all US citizens on Canadian soil arrested and declares he will throw one to a horde of angry beavers every day until the President restores the internet.
But one brave US citizen, Amala Patel, comes up with a plan to stop the carnage. She volunteers to be the next victim on the condition that the prime minister listen to her tell a story before her mauling. The bored, internet-starved prime minister agrees and becomes so enthralled by her fables that he continually postpones her mauling so he can hear more.
The Canadian Nights is a compilation of Amala's sixteen best fables.
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