If you are looking for a nice story about a boy who wins a golden ticket, you have picked up the wrong book.

This is the story of Fish, a boy with a very unlucky life.

Fish lives in the one place you never want to visit: a towering junkyard at the top of the world, ruled by a mother who makes wicked witches look like guidance counselors. Fish has never left the heap. He has never smelled a flower. He has definitely never seen the ocean.

Until the day he decides to invent a way out.

What follows is a series of events that are mostly dangerous, entirely dreadful, and likely to leave a stain. From mechanical mishaps to very smelly villains, Fish is about to learn that adventure is a dirty business.

Read at your own risk.