Life as Clerk-in-Charge of Avocado Preservation in the Mountain City of Axototl was a real cushy number. Hurling a few bones about the place, peering into the future, foreseeing all the forthcoming problems screaming your way and making plans to dodge destiny's hurled brickbats. Piece of cake.

Or at least it would have been if Quintzi Cohatl actually possessed anything even remotely resembling foresight. After forty years in the job his lies were getting a bit thin. So when a travelling salesman offered him a bargain crystal (with Scry Movie Channel option) how could he refuse?

Certainly Merlot and the proto-mage Hogshead would have preferred it if he had. Then they wouldn't have a clump of murdered wizards dumped in the River Slove on their hands. And as for the folks of Axolotl - they wouldn't have had to discover the amazing explosive potential of a few hundred prize melons.